Quick Self Confidence

This is guest post by Mark Tyrrell of Hypnosis Downloads.  There is nothing I really need to add, as he captures the very essence of self confidence in this article.

Improve your self confidence in 15 minutes

quick self confidence

15 minutes – what’s the rush?

I used to be frighteningly under confident in social situations. And although people who know me now would never believe I used to doubt myself so much I literally had to learn confidence until it became a natural part of me. I can tell you relaxed optimistic confidence is just, well so much more fun.


Here I’ll tell you about the things that made the most difference to my confidence levels…

Some people have naturally high levels of confidence but everybody can learn to be more confident

Firstly, it’s important to get a clear idea of what self confidence really means, otherwise you won’t know when you’ve got it! So, self confidence means:

1) Being calm. For every situation in life you need to run on the appropriate level of emotion. Too much emotional ‘leakage’ into a experience can spoil the experience. You make great strides towards confidence when you begin to relax in a greater range of situations.

2) Being cool. The second part of self confidence is about being able to relax with uncertainty. To be ‘cool’ in a situation really means relaxing with not knowing how things will pan out. If you truly tolerate uncertainty, you can do pretty much anything.

3) Not being too concerned with what others think of you. You know when you imagine what some place is going to be like before you go there but when you get there it is totally different to your imagination? That’s how reliable your imagination is! Stop trusting your imagination so much. I’ve long since stopped bothering to imagine what others think of me because so often I’ve turned out to be wrong.

4) Being specific – where do you want confidence?Confidence‘ is meaningless until you tie it to something specific. You are already confident that you can read these words or can switch a light on and off. So you don’t need more confidence everywhere. To get what you want in life you have to establish exactly what you do want. Where do you want confidence in your life? Think about the specific situations now and write them down. You beginning to steer your brain towards confidence.

5) Understanding that what you expect is what you get. Your brain is an organ that needs clear goals to work towards. When a task has been set in your brain it will do everything it can do to bring about the completion of that task. If you’ve tried to recall someone’s name but can’t, hours later you’ll often find their name pops into your head.

The ‘trying to recall’ experience set the task or blueprint for your brain’s future subconscious behaviour which eventually produced the name for you – when you weren’t thinking about it consciously. You can use this natural mechanism to start feeling more confident. But, to ensure you set the right task for your subconscious mind, the next point is vital.

6) Don’t task your mind with negatives. Instead of: ‘I don’t want to screw up’ (which sets the task of ‘screwing up’ for your brain), set the blueprint for what you do want! Your brain doesn’t work towards what to do by being told what not to do. And nature has given you a wonderful natural tool to set the right task blueprints with.

7) Use nature’s goal-setter: Now you understand how vital it is to set the right task for you brain, you need to know how to do this reliably. Good hypnosis will strongly ‘program’ the right blueprint in your mind through the use of your imagination. If you powerfully imagine feeling confident and relaxed while in a relaxed hypnotic state it will be hard for your unconscious mind to do anything else. The blueprint for relaxation has been set firmly into your subconscious mind.

3 simple strategies to get you feeling confident quickly:

1) Think specifically of the time/place/situation you want to feel confident in. Remember ‘confidence’ doesn’t mean anything until you attach it to something specific.

2) Focus on words in your mind right now that describe how you do want to be in that time and place. Maybe words such as ‘calm’, ‘relaxed’ or ‘focused’. Remember your brain works on clear positive instructions.

3) Close your eyes for as long as you like and think about how those words feel. Then, imagine the situation itself and rehearse it in your mind feeling confident and relaxed. This way you set the right blueprint or ‘task’ for your unconscious mind.

You can repeat this often to make it more effective and use it with as many areas of your life as you need to. If you listen to a hypnotic cd or download that can make the benefits even more powerful (see my profile below). So if you feel like you’d be blessed with less confidence than some other people you can start redressing the balance by using your mind in the right way right now.

It took me years to learn how to be more confident – now you can do it in a fraction of the time. Good luck!

Boost your confidence now at HypnosisDownloads.com

Article by Mark Tyrrell of Hypnosis Downloads.com.

Photo by Sukanto Debnath on Flickr

superdaddy2007 September 14, 2011 at 10:33 am

Hi Mark,

I really like the simple way you characterized the self confidence states. I am a sports psychologist and recently just conducted a workshop for some athletes. Would have included some of your list in. As for increasing self confidence quite here are the three simple methods I shared with the athletes the other day:

1) Recalling past successes.

2) Positive self talk which I think you spoke about.

3) Developing a routine of activities.


steve werner November 14, 2011 at 1:05 pm

all great ideas for building confidence.

also, learn to speak more of your achievements then your failures!!


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Debbie @ Happy Maker November 28, 2011 at 5:21 pm

Wonderful tips for confidence Mark. Having confidence can make a world of difference in anyone’s life.

I like all 7 tips, but I do believe staying calm is very important one. When doing this we will always stop and think before we speak. This to me can be a key to confidence. Choosing our words carefully.

Thanks again Mark a great post.
Blessing to you and Thanks David for having him.

Brittany Dickey January 17, 2012 at 4:28 am

I am a young woman working hard at gaining confidence and this article immensely helped me. I have written down where I need confidence specifically. Honestly, I can not even picture the situation where I want to add confidence so that shows I have plenty of work to do. I keep thinking wow what would that be like?!!!! At least I now have a direction to work toward. Thanks for your insight!

Joanna June 16, 2012 at 9:36 pm

Smiling is catching. If you don’t believe me, smile at a few individuals over the next few time. Don’t grin like a fanatic (that just places other individuals off), just allow yourself to smile normally. You’ll be pleased how many individuals will smile returning. Which, in convert, creates them seem user friendly and more friendly, which will help with your self esteem stages

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