Great Self Confidence

...to live the life you want

How to find Happiness

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happinessI have read quite a few posts about happyness recently, as another blogger Alex Shalman has a Happiness project going on. Its taken me a while to answer his questions, which are at the end of this post.

I have read many times that if you’re aim and energies are directed to finding happiness itself, you will never find it. That to try and seek happiness directly is doomed to failure. I would very much subscribe to that view. But whilst recognizing that this is important, it doesn’t take away from the fact that as individuals and society we can do many things that will make us happier.

Some argue that Governments should do more, and focus less on economic growth and more on policies that will help the people they serve find happiness. Some Governments, such as Bhutan, have even started to do that! The fact remains that despite having greater wealth, better standards of living and possessions galore to improve our happiness, in most Western countries happiness levels have declined over the past 50 years. [Read more…]

Seven strange things you didn’t want to know

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confident giraffeThis is my 99th post. The first to include a competition (now over) To date I have sprinkled the odd bit of personal information, trying to avoid being too self indulgent or bore you with irrelevant facts.

Recently I was asked to come up with 7 Strange but True Things about Me. So here I go (if you’re impatient, the competition is in point 7!)

1) I currently live 6 miles from where I was born; I’ve never lived more than about 5 miles from the sea, always along the South Coast of England. As far as I’m concerned, visiting London is “going up North”. One of the most important skills I learned at school was how to swim. Its never too late to learn if you can’t.

2) I ran the London marathon in 1998. The most traumatic part was the finish – I found myself running alongside three men dressed up as the Teletubbies, the popular children’s television characters. Suddenly I could see myself in my finishing photo, crossing the line with my arms raised in triumph – but as the fourth, missing, Teletubbie! The thought of being called Tinky Winky forever more spurred a sprint out of my tired legs. The thought of humiliation can be a great motivator. [Read more…]

Anxiety, Affirmations & Yaro

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affirmationsThis is the first time I have written about Yaro Starak, although he is probably someone whose work I have read more than anyone since I started this blog. Yaro writes about blogging – so whilst of interest to me, I have assumed he won’t be of interest to anyone visiting this site. If you do blog, Yaro has a free blueprint which is worth reading – I can also recommend his Blog Mastermind course when he next runs one.

I mention him, because I happened on one of his posts from 2006 called The Key to Happiness. Yaro doesn’t normally venture into self improvement posts, but I found it quite an eye opener. By accident, rather than design, my recent posts have all featured successful people who had overcome various adversities in their youth. I now found out that Yaro had suffered from panic attacks in his late teens and early twenties.

Anxiety related problems sometimes get short shrift in the media, as we all get anxious at times. Our physiological make up has programmed in a fight or flight response, so our body can get suitably “prepared” if confronted by danger. Unfortunately, this hasn’t evolved over the years to take on board that usually most of us don’t encounter life threatening danger – tigers and other wild animals are now enclosed in cages. [Read more…]

Never judge the day by the weather

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This is a quick, extra, post mainly prompted by my making a total hash of trying to get a video clip on yesterdays post. It doesn’t appear to work in Internet Explorer (get Firefox – it’s better anyway!!) and I now realize those getting the RSS feed didn’t get anything, so the post may have read a little strange. Click on Stephen Fry for the You Tube video.

The other thing to say is that today in the UK has been calculated as the “most depressing day of the year”. A University researcher has come up with a formula that takes into account various factors such as weather, day of the week, debts from Christmas, failure of New Year resolutions (!) and found the third Monday in January is the day to stay in bed!

This story has been on our radio and television, but the link above was the main one I could find on Google. The author has clearly missed the point – he argues from California that sometime in November is a more depressing day. But with the weather we tend to get in January (its hardly stopped raining) – which we love to talk about – its not exactly a surprising finding.

Has anyone got a formula for the Happiest Day of the Year? One thing I have done recently is replayed an old Zig Ziglar audiotape I purchased many years ago. One of his “suggestions” is “never judge the day by the weather“. Today there are many people out there celebrating the birth of a child or some other momentous event. Does it matter to them if its raining or snowing or blowing a gale?

We should celebrate everyday we get, whatever the weather. We will never get 21st January 2008 ever again – its gone. I hope you made the most of it.

Stop feeling sorry for yourself

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Stephen Fry is always entertaining (to me anyway!) and usually gives interesting reflections on life:- 

This video has now been withdrawn from YouTube – copyright problems with the BBC!

You could have see it on You Tube My recent posts have highlighted the less than perfect starts of people who went on to great success in their chosen fields. Despite an affluent background, Stephen Fry described his teenage years as having a "tendency to lie, cheat and steal". So much so that at 18 he was sent to prison for 3 months for credit card fraud! 

[Read more…]