I’ve been running a series of blogs that look at saying “No“ an essential part of confident communication. For some, learning to say this small word isn’t easy. We have learnt that saying no makes us uncaring, or selfish. Also, we learn to believe that by saying no we might lose friends, upset family or work colleagues.

Along with practicing the techniques for saying “No”, it is useful to tackle some of the underlying thinking that feeds these feelings. A good starting point is to draw up a “bill of rights” your rights. Here are a few suggestions

I have the right to:

respect myself

respect others

make mistakes

change my mind

to have my own opinions and values and share them with others

choose my friends

have time to myself each day

say what I feel

to be listened to

be free from physical or mental abuse

be (or become) healthy

be trusted

be happy

express my feelings

ask for what I want (accepting I may not always get it)